"I tried exercise but found I was allergic to it - my skin flushed, my heart raced, I got sweaty, short of breath. Very very dangerous."
-Unknown
"Are you fat and ugly? Join our gym and just be ugly!"
-Local gym sign
"When people ask me if I exercise I tell them I do crunches every day - especially Captain Crunch and Nestle Crunch"
-Unknown
"I’m afraid the handle on your recliner chair does not count as an exercise machine"
-Doctor (to patient)
"I really think that tossing and turning at night should be considered exercise!"
-Unknown
"I have to exercise in the morning before my brain figures out what I’m doing"
-Unknown
"My favourite exercise at the gym would probably be judging"
-Unknown
"Every time I hear the dirty word ‘Exercise’ I wash my mouth out with chocolate!"
-Unknown
"1) Rabbits hop all day, only eat vegetables, but only live 5 years
2) Whales swim all day, only eat fish, only drink water, but are fat
3) Tortoises do nothing energetic but live for 250 years
And you tell me to exercise? I don’t think so!
"
2) Whales swim all day, only eat fish, only drink water, but are fat
3) Tortoises do nothing energetic but live for 250 years
And you tell me to exercise? I don’t think so!
"
-Unknown
"I spend my time at the gym doing diddly squats"
-Unknown
"I run…
I may be slower than a turtle wading through peanut butter…
… But I run!"
I may be slower than a turtle wading through peanut butter…
… But I run!"
-Unknown
"I believe that every human has a finite amount of heartbeats. I don’t intend to waste any of mine running around doing exercises."
-Neil Armstrong
"I’m opening a gym called “Resolutions.” It will have exercise equipment for the first two weeks of the year then turn into a bar for the rest of it!"
-Unknown
"Instead of calling my bathroom the “John” I call it the “Jim”. That way it sounds better when I say “I go to the Jim first thing every morning”"
-Unknown
"It doesn’t matter how slow you jog - you’re lapping everyone on the couch"
-all-fit.tumblr.com
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